The Perfect New Mother

I recall the weeks prior to the delivery dates of my children. They were filled with happiness and joy, anxiety and concern, and impatience and anticipation. I wondered if everything was in order, hoping that everything was just right for this new arrival.

Looking back, it wasn’t.

There always seemed to be something that I had forgotten or some way that I could have been better prepared. The laundry seemed endless, as it always does. All of those freezer meals that I had planned to pack away so that my husband wouldn’t come to me after having just gone through the most intense experience of my life and ask, “Hey Honey. What’s for dinner?,” weren’t quite complete ( I have concluded now that I am just not very good at the whole “nesting” concept.).

But when it came down to it, it didn’t matter. I thought, “Oh well. No big deal.” Because nothing, no matter the circumstance or situation, will ever be in perfect order or proper place. That, is just the way it is. It’s not a rule I made up, but rather a plain and simple fact of life that cannot be altered. In the past, I focused so much on making things just so, that most everything decided to contradict my carefully plotted strategies.

And that is alright.

Only recently, have I Iearned to “go with the flow.” And when I find that I am overly planning, I step back and make efforts to simplify. That way there’s not much room for disappointment. Which is the exact emotion that a pregnant woman and new mother doesn’t need. Perhaps it has come out of necessity. Perhaps disinterest. Perhaps from pure laziness. But I do know that my life as it stands now is a lot less stressful. There is something liberating about letting things just be. Not to say that I don’t experience stress on a daily basis. But what of it I do feel, it is on a much lesser degree.

You must tell yourself that you are a soon to be new mother and will be great at it. Or, that you are already a great mother, and that you are doing something that no one else can do. With that comes untouched joy. As you get through each day thereafter, you will realize that you have this new love and this untouchable power that only a mother can have. As out of order and dismayed that you may feel (and probably be), you will realize that nothing else matters.

Some of the best advice that I received was that my new child and I were both new to everything. We were both learning in every moment. We would both be imperfect limited in what we knew. But we were learning and growing together. And that is enough.

Like this post? Click the letter icon and send me an email!